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So, it's been a while since I've posted so I thought I would update a little about what's going on with my brother and his girls since they're still here. Danny finally had enough. Anyone that knows Danny, which isn't very many people on here I must admit, knows that when he's finally had enough, you better watch out because he'll go on a rampage. And that's pretty much what happened.
Friday night, after taking the last half of the day off work for reasons that should be explained in another post, I came home to find a filthy kitchen. Two grown men living in the same house, and neither one of them can do the dishes? Danny asked me if I could help him clean the kitchen before he made dinner and I told him I was tired and wanted to just sit for a minute or so then I would help. He took it wrong and started throwing dishes around to clear the sink and broke a few things. Then he got angry about breaking things and decided that he would just break some more. It's been a long time since I've actually seen him lose his temper like that and I was concerned. So I went in to help and he yelled at me to get out of the kitchen. I thought he was angry at me for not helping him and it wasn't until later when he calmed down enough to talk that I found out that he didn't mean to break anything and yelled at me to get out because I didn't have any shoes on and he didn't want me to get glass in my foot before he could clean the mess up off the floor. He just has a wierd way of expressing his feelings sometimes and it came across differently to me.
We have split the laundry days into sections. BJ is able to do laundry Monday through Friday for him and the girls. I give him an extra span of time because the girls don't have much in the way of clothing so they need to be washed more often. Saturday and Sunday are my days. I don't let Danny do my laundry because I like my clothes and don't want them to be washed with bleeding colors or the wrong soap. :) Saturday I was doing some laundry. I had gotten tired of running up and down stairs and decided to take a break. So, since Danny was taking a nap, I told my brother to do a few loads of his own laundry. When Danny woke up, he wanted to wash the bedding and went downstairs to do so. Only to find that my brother was doing the laundry. He came up and I explained to him that I wanted to take a break and let my brother do some laundry for a while. And he went off! He went downstairs and yelled at my brother for doing laundry on my laundry day and then yelled about a few other things. I should probably give you a little more history of the situation... Danny has expressed to me that he is the wrong person to try to help someone fight to keep his kids. The reason for this is because 10 years ago, when he left his ex-wife, he didn't go back to Virginia to fight for his own daughter who has since been put in foster care. Mostly because of finances but it's still a sore subject for him. So when he sees someone that says they want to keep their kids and then neglects them or doesn't spend any time with them, it hits in the wrong way. So he went off mostly about that, but the laundry was apparently the straw that broke his back. My brother freaked and left. He went out so he could get service on his cell phone and called my father. I called him too and told him that I didn't know what to do and thought it would be best if we could find somewhere else for BJ and the girls to go. So my dad decided that he would send him the money to go down to Alabama and he would look after them to make sure all was taken care of. But (this is where it starts to get confusing) after talking to Danny about it, I had to call my dad back and tell him not to help BJ leave but to play the mediator long enough to explain to him that he needed to start doing his fatherly responsibilities or Danny was going to have the girls taken away from him. All he has to do is care for his girls, play with them, help them do homework, spend time with them... and he can stay here as long as he needs to. But Danny is tired of seeing someone that doesn't do anything with them. He spends more time on his computer while his kids are playing and entertaining themselves in another part of the house.
It took about 2 hours, but everyone calmed down finally and BJ came back and was able to talk to Danny. I have to say... it's been almost a week, and Danny isn't expecting anything to stay this way (his negative personality)... but BJ is a totally different person with his kids. And the girls actually have a different glow in their eyes. It's nice to see since they've been so confused for such a long time. BJ actually woke up before anyone else Sunday morning and made pancakes for everyone for breakfast before church. He didn't go to church with any of us, but that's still in the works. That's not something that I'm able to force him to do but I will make the decision for the girls and they will go with us. But it's something that's between God and BJ. When he feels convicted enough, he'll go to church.
So everything is going good right now. I'm home again from work today. I've been missing alot of work and I think it's because of the stress levels in this house. But like I said before, That's a story for another post. :)
Friday night, after taking the last half of the day off work for reasons that should be explained in another post, I came home to find a filthy kitchen. Two grown men living in the same house, and neither one of them can do the dishes? Danny asked me if I could help him clean the kitchen before he made dinner and I told him I was tired and wanted to just sit for a minute or so then I would help. He took it wrong and started throwing dishes around to clear the sink and broke a few things. Then he got angry about breaking things and decided that he would just break some more. It's been a long time since I've actually seen him lose his temper like that and I was concerned. So I went in to help and he yelled at me to get out of the kitchen. I thought he was angry at me for not helping him and it wasn't until later when he calmed down enough to talk that I found out that he didn't mean to break anything and yelled at me to get out because I didn't have any shoes on and he didn't want me to get glass in my foot before he could clean the mess up off the floor. He just has a wierd way of expressing his feelings sometimes and it came across differently to me.
We have split the laundry days into sections. BJ is able to do laundry Monday through Friday for him and the girls. I give him an extra span of time because the girls don't have much in the way of clothing so they need to be washed more often. Saturday and Sunday are my days. I don't let Danny do my laundry because I like my clothes and don't want them to be washed with bleeding colors or the wrong soap. :) Saturday I was doing some laundry. I had gotten tired of running up and down stairs and decided to take a break. So, since Danny was taking a nap, I told my brother to do a few loads of his own laundry. When Danny woke up, he wanted to wash the bedding and went downstairs to do so. Only to find that my brother was doing the laundry. He came up and I explained to him that I wanted to take a break and let my brother do some laundry for a while. And he went off! He went downstairs and yelled at my brother for doing laundry on my laundry day and then yelled about a few other things. I should probably give you a little more history of the situation... Danny has expressed to me that he is the wrong person to try to help someone fight to keep his kids. The reason for this is because 10 years ago, when he left his ex-wife, he didn't go back to Virginia to fight for his own daughter who has since been put in foster care. Mostly because of finances but it's still a sore subject for him. So when he sees someone that says they want to keep their kids and then neglects them or doesn't spend any time with them, it hits in the wrong way. So he went off mostly about that, but the laundry was apparently the straw that broke his back. My brother freaked and left. He went out so he could get service on his cell phone and called my father. I called him too and told him that I didn't know what to do and thought it would be best if we could find somewhere else for BJ and the girls to go. So my dad decided that he would send him the money to go down to Alabama and he would look after them to make sure all was taken care of. But (this is where it starts to get confusing) after talking to Danny about it, I had to call my dad back and tell him not to help BJ leave but to play the mediator long enough to explain to him that he needed to start doing his fatherly responsibilities or Danny was going to have the girls taken away from him. All he has to do is care for his girls, play with them, help them do homework, spend time with them... and he can stay here as long as he needs to. But Danny is tired of seeing someone that doesn't do anything with them. He spends more time on his computer while his kids are playing and entertaining themselves in another part of the house.
It took about 2 hours, but everyone calmed down finally and BJ came back and was able to talk to Danny. I have to say... it's been almost a week, and Danny isn't expecting anything to stay this way (his negative personality)... but BJ is a totally different person with his kids. And the girls actually have a different glow in their eyes. It's nice to see since they've been so confused for such a long time. BJ actually woke up before anyone else Sunday morning and made pancakes for everyone for breakfast before church. He didn't go to church with any of us, but that's still in the works. That's not something that I'm able to force him to do but I will make the decision for the girls and they will go with us. But it's something that's between God and BJ. When he feels convicted enough, he'll go to church.
So everything is going good right now. I'm home again from work today. I've been missing alot of work and I think it's because of the stress levels in this house. But like I said before, That's a story for another post. :)
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